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Embracing Your TRUE Self: How to Live An Ego-Free, Soul-Led, Heart-Driven Life

In this fast-paced world we live, its so easy to get stuck in tunnel vision- going through the motions of life without considering the WHY of what we do. It is part of the universal human experience to be torn between the desires of our ego and the yearnings of our soul.

In this blog, we'll delve into differences between living an ego-led life to embracing the path of your spirit. We'll explore how shifting and aligning with your soul's truth and divine love can bring about profound inner transformation, fulfillment and harmony.

"Ego says, 'Once everything falls into place, I'll feel peace.' Spirit says, 'Find your peace, and then everything will fall into place.'"

Marianne Williamson

The Shadow of the Ego

The ego operates from a place of FEAR. Fear of .....

  • discomfort

  • failure

  • rejection

  • inadequacy

As such, an ego-based path is constrictive, constrained, controlled and limiting. It involves setting boundaries, judgements and exclusions driven by perceived threats.

Ego-based motivation is driven by a desire for POWER, CONTROL and PERSONAL GAIN. It manifests as an attachment to external markers or standards of success and validation - "achievements" like social status, material gain and group acceptance. It's all about creating an ILLUSION of success.

Ego-Driven Behaviors include:

  • Seeking recognition, praise, approval and admiration

  • Pursuing fame, or fortune

  • Striving to compete, control, dominate or outdo others

  • Avoiding risks and challenges

  • Making decisions based on what others expect or want, conforming to expectations even if it goes against personal values.

  • Chasing excess consumerism and material wealth

  • Chasing accomplishments and possessions,

  • Constantly measuring oneself against others

  • Reacting defensively to criticism or differing opinions

All of these behaviors are with the intent to feel

  • adequate

  • worthy

  • important

  • valued

  • adored

  • admired

  • content

Or to

  • prove superiority

  • ensure a desired outcome

  • avoid disapproval or embarrassment

  • prevent failure

  • impress others

  • protect one's self-image or status

The ego is forever seeking something outside itself to feel complete but the ego's desires are insatiable. We will always be in a state of emptiness or lack because nothing is ever good enough. There is always more to see, do, be, achieve, chase. This endless and impossible pursuit for happiness and fulfillment often leaves us depressed and irritable, which then backfires in our relationships and others parts of our lives.

"If you are content with being no one in particular, content not to stand out then you align yourself with the power of the universe. What looks like weakness to the ego is in fact the only true strength"

Eckhart Tolle

The Light of the Spirit

The soul, in contrast, operates from a place of LOVE. Love for

  • ourselves

  • for others

  • the world around us

As such, a soul-based path is expansive and inclusive.

Soul-based motivation is driven by a desire for CONNECTION and CONTRIBUTION to the greater good. It comes from a place of true passion and purpose.

It manifests as seeking internal satisfaction and intrinsic fullfillment a meaningful life. recognizing that true strength lies in lifting others up.

Soul-driven behaviors are growth-oriented and include

Connection & Community

  • Working together, collaborating and supporting others to achieve collective important.

  • Seeking to understand others' perspectives, feelings, and experiences, and extend empathy and compassion without judgment.

  • Engaging in simple and random acts of kindness to create ripples of positivity.

  • Offering our time, help, and resources without expecting anything in return, cherishing the act of giving itself.

Individuation & Self-Love

  • Pursuing activities and goals that align with personal values, passions, and inner joy.

  • Seeking personal development and wisdom to evolve, grow and learn.

  • Welcoming challenges as opportunities for growth, regardless of outcomes.

  • Making choices that resonate with personal values and beliefs, regardless of external opinions.

  • Recognizing and accepting your own uniqueness, as well as others differences, and feeling content without comparison or judgement.

  • Taking responsibility for one's own problems and problem solving

  • Claiming ones innate gifts, talents, passions and the essence of who we are beyond the physical realm

  • Recognizing our inherent worthiness and value, treating ourselves with the same love and care we extend to others

  • Embracing feedback as a chance to learn and improve without feeling threatened.

  • Living authentically, showing up as true selves, even if it means being imperfect or unconventional or outside of social norms.

  • Practicing emotional vulnerability and expressiveness to foster genuine connections and create meaningful relationships based on mutual understanding, trust and acceptance.

Mindfulness & Openness

  • Allowing life to unfold naturally and being open to all possibilities and opportunities, without attempting to control every aspect.

  • Practicing detachment from outcome, as well as detachment from external circumstaces

  • Embracing forgiveness, letting go of grudges and freeing ourselves from the burden of negativity.

  • Being present, mindful and intentional in our interactions with others and nature

  • Appreciate the blessings and joys in life, expressing gratitude to others for the love and support they bring to our lives

  • Listening with an open Heart, valuing what others have to say, and validating their feelings.

A soul-driven lifestyle tends to be more expansive and inclusive, full of greater joy, acceptance, adventure and spontaneity. It's the wellspring of our deepest passions, values, and truths.

Outcomes of a soul-driven lifestyle include

  • deep, meaningful loving relationships

  • fulfilling, gratifying work

  • creativity and self-expression

  • inner peace and harmony

Being human is complex, and its perfectly normal for people to experience both ego-driven and spirit-driven motives in various aspects of their lives. The key is to become aware of these motivations and consciously choose actions that align with a more authentic and soulful path.

"Your soul is the place within you that is timeless, ageless, and eternal. It's the divine essence that animates your being."

Debbie Ford

Life Purpose vs Soul Purpose

To western cultures, we are alive for a reason: to work, to make money, to achieve. In contrast, many indigenous and eastern cultures believe we are alive for no reason other than to be alive. Just like nature, we're here to be beautiful. We're here to just BE, not DO.

In some other world perspectives, we have both a Life Purpose and a Soul Purpose.

Life Purpose is the most commonly understood type of Purpose. It usually relates to our external accomplishments: our career choices, our personal goals, and achieving more "measurable" forms of success like wealth, or family. This often involves Manifestation and telling the universe what we want to be or have.

In contrast, our Soul Purpose is about the motivation and essence behind our actions and choices.

It involves

  • focusing on the essence of one's actions and choices.

  • surrendering ego stories and conditioning to allow one's innate talents and gifts to shine

  • giving and serving others for the pure purpose and intent of it

  • trusting self and make decisions from a place of inner wisdom and integrity.

  • aligning to one's true self, not conforming to external expectations

  • serving humanity and radiating love, regardless of the nature of the role.

Every Soul Purpose is equally important, valuable and critical, no matter how visible it appears to be. Some Purpose can be in the spotlight and recognized in the public eye, while others lie more behind the scenes or as "supporting roles" to enable others to fulfill their Purpose.

Even if our Soul Purpose seems small, simple or more subtley perceived, it can be spiritually advanced and deeply fulfilling. Similarly the presence or absence of financial wealth is not a defining factor of Soul Purpose. While money may be used to help others or expand the reach of a loving message it shouldn't be the primary focus of ones life

A life lived with love can uplift all of humanity.

Your Unique Journey

Discovering your Soul Purpose requires deep introspection and self-awareness. It involves becoming still enough to hear what one's essence and inner guidance truly resonate with.

Human Design is a tool that can help with this process, bringing clarity and confidence in our True Self. The system acknowledges that there is no one-size-fits-all answer to life and encourages us to spend our precious time and energy exploring our personal interests and leaning into what brings us joy.

Note that some individuals will be "late bloomers" and struggle to identify their mission or purpose until much later in life. This could be due to their unique gates (especially 28), or their design type (Projector), or their general ignorance (lack of self awareness) or immaturity (lack of experience).

There are also a few astrological events milestones to pass before you can fully embody the energy and wisdom of your Purpose.

  • Ages 27-31: First Saturn return, leaving youth behind and entering adulthood.

  • Ages 38-48: Pluto Square, Neptune Square, Uranus Opposition, Saturn Opposition

  • Ages 56-60: Second Saturn return, maturity.

  • Ages 84-90: Final Saturn return, wisdom

"Maro. n. (mare-o) Japense origin. True or sincere heart in Japanese. It is a state of unconditional love and selflessless, the opposite of Ego.

Wrapping It All Up

At the end of the day, we must always understand where our desires come from first. If our need for success, fame, money, a relationship are generated from a place of insecurity or inadequacy, a fear of failure, vulnerability, rejection then they will simply not be sustainable. We must channel our happiness and fulfillment from within first!


Embracing and living a soul-led life involves listening to the whispers of our inner voice When we tune into our soul's desires, we connect with a sense of authenticity and belonging to something larger than ourselves.

Living in alignment with our soul requires a shift in priorities, going inward instead of looking outwards. This can liberate us from the constraints of the Ego. From there we create a life that resonates with our unique design and inner truth.

This journey requires self-awareness, introspection, and a willingness to explore the depths of our being. This can be scary to be so open-hearted. Just remember, what's meant for you will have a nearly effortless fit and FLOW. You'll never have to force any connection, attachment or anything that truly aligns.

When we are always chasing external validations that are fleeting in nature, then we will be chasing happiness forever. Instead, let's find contentment in the simple things in life:

  • Friends, family and the connections we make with others

  • Being our true, authentic selves and sharing our gifts and talents

  • Nature

  • Art and music

Indeed, Life is for Loving and Loving! A soul-led life invites us to let go of the ego's illusions. It's a journey that requires courage, self-awareness, and a commitment to cultivating compassion and vulnerability. By choosing to live from the depths of our soul, we create a genuine connection with ourselves and the world around us. THIS is our Purpose.

Want support in leading a soul-led life? If you are ready to embark on a journey of self-discovery, healing, and alignment, I invite you to take the next step and reach out. The systems and tools of Human Design provide an amazing framework for helping navigate this process. I look forward to working with you.

"Ego rushes and reacts, but Peace moves intentionally and gently."

Yung Pueblo


Erin is a certified feng shui consultant, energy healer, wellness coach and holistic growth strategist.

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